Purity Balls!

Just watched the following video, here. And this was my response to the person who posted it, asking if it came across as "mildly creepy":

It does come across as slightly creepy. I hope that is because of the way it was reported, rather than us being so jaded by modern society that we have to look at a celebration of the father/daughter bond as something slightly suspect or mildly "off". I see nothing wrong with most of the "celibate 'til marriage" movements in themselves. I do think that any father that thinks he can prevent his daughter from premarital sex is naive at best, and quite possibly horribly foolish. I would certainly hope that fathers of these girls don't just isolate them from the young men that "only want one thing" (which is not entirely true of the horniest teenage boy), but also give them honest information about safe sex practices. I would have been very interested to see what these dads are telling their sons, in contrast to what they tell the girls. (It had better be a message of respecting and honoring women, and their roles in society!) I do think the movements that are based on the kids pledging to themselves, are more realistic than the ones pledging to their church or parents.

So, tell me, what do you guys think? I don't think it simply boils down to "Christians versus secular society", the way the video clip tried to subtly hint. Or a "home school vs. community" type of issue, either. As a father of young men, myself, I have wondered often if my parenting style in these matters would have been different had I raised daughters instead. I like to think not, that even if I had a daughter, I would have told her the same facts of life I told the boys. (Which I won't repeat at length here, suffice to say I was much more open and instructive than my Dad, whose complete birds & bees talk amounted to:

Dad ~ "You know all about that stuff, right?"
Me ~  "Yeah, Dad."
Dad ~ "Good." 

when I got married at the age of 26!)
I think the issue boils down to how we best prepare our children for the world, whether we are better off trying to keep them safe from the scary world outside our doors, free from harm. Or if it is wise to try to instruct them in the ways of the world, to beware its temptations as they become aware of them.
I don't know the answer. I know I chose the latter. I think I chose correctly, but I don't know, and may not until I become a grandfather someday. (Hopefully, not soon, but also not too far off, either.)
Maybe in this day and age, Chastity is just Sonny and Cher's daughter.

Cleaning sucks!

I've been helping my sister clean the kitchen today, and I am worn out. Why is it that once you get started, there are always a thousand other things to do just to get the one project done?
Anyway, I just wanted to let everyone know that i am not skipping my daily post because I have nothing to say, but more because I am too tired to say it.
(My arms are so stiff that typing makes them sore!)
See everyone tomorrow, and I will expound on some subject, I promise.

Teacher abuse

Today I thought I would say a little something on the subject of teacher abuse. I am not talking about abusive teachers, (any of those should be summarily fired!) but the heaps of abuse that get piled on our teachers by practically everyone. Parents blame teachers for their kid's problems in school, students often verbally and sometimes even physically abuse their teachers, politicians blame teachers for poor school performance, principals blame teachers for poor test scores. Let's face it, our teachers are asked to do a very thankless job, of inestimable importance, with little economic or social support, in less than ideal situations, for very little renumeration.
When you really stop to think about it, there are very few jobs as important as the preparation of the next generation to be able to become the informed, dedicated citizens we need in a representative republic to take hold of the reins of society.
As more and more parents find it impossible to make ends meet without both parents entering the workplace, we depend more and more on our teachers in schools and preschools to  step up and take up much of the parent's former tasks of showing our children how to become future citizens.
Instead of us recognizing how important this is, we blame teachers for the slightest failures, when parents should be setting examples at home.
Our politicians should be setting examples for our children of tolerance, cooperation, and the benefits of leadership. Instead, they are showing the same type of petty squabbling that was once punished by time outs in kindergarten. In the next breath, they blame teachers for unruly classrooms.
Business leaders once recognized that education was one of the wisest investments, many of the worst robber barons of the Victorian era were generous in funding educational programs of many sorts. Now, "meeting the bottom line" means that teachers buy their own supplies to simply meet classroom demand, and many if not most of our schools are overcrowded, poorly maintained, and frankly, worn out. Students are forced to sell unwanted crap to parents who can't afford it simply to have the funds to maintain their school activities.
When funding is cut, education is always the first hit, and educative administrations are not going to cut their own wages, so teachers salaries are often the hardest hit.
The only benefit we get out of all of this is that only those most dedicated of teachers will continue to teach under such dire conditions, but those same teachers are often the ones who get burnt out in this hopeless spiral of asking teachers to continue to do more with less, for longer hours and less pay, with no thanks but societal derision.
I wonder how many people in any other profession would do the same.
If you are reading this (at this time in my blogging career, that may be doubtful), you can thank a teacher. If you caught any errors in grammar or spelling, you can thank your teachers. If you understood it, thank my teachers. If you feel moved by it, thank any teacher.
Go on. They're waiting.

But let us be clear about one thing, let's stop piling the abuse on one of the most important but least appreciated professions in existence: Teaching.

Let's remember our history.

I just read something here that really truly bothers me on several levels. For those that don't wish to follow the link, the governor of Maine, Paul LePage, wants to remove a mural from the Department of Labor depicting historical labor events of Maine, because it makes business leaders uncomfortable.

Reading the article, which is highly against him, I had to admit that part of what he was saying was still valid, that if you want to create an atmosphere of cooperation, you need to make both sides feel as comfortable as possible.

That said, I have to speak out against this latest move to turn our backs on history, just because it makes someone uncomfortable.

There is a long list of events of this sort, from trying to remove the name of Confederate generals from campus dorms, to changing the flags of former Confederate states by removing the Confederate battle flag, both in the name of making those Americans of African descent feel less minimized or demeaned, (although a worthy goal in itself); all the way down to re-packaging Aunt Jemima as a coiffed chef wearing pearls, instead of the slave mammy she started out as, so as to remove an offensive stereotype. (Again, not an unworthy goal, by itself).

This also includes the minimization of the Japanese internment camps that were opened in Colorado during the second world war, or the trivialization of the genocide perpetrated unlawfully against the Cherokee on the Trail of Tears, not to mention similar fates of other native nations much less well known.

Part of the problem is the way historians generally seem to sanitize our history for us, by reducing human stories to a series of images, names, dates, and places. This is something to be expected with the passing of time, as generations further from the events being told feel much less of the passion behind them, or have such a differing point of view that truly understanding such events requires study and analysis which takes more time  than most people have to devote to them.

However, time and time again, we see people in leadership positions use their positions to "whitewash" history, the best example probably that of the American Civil War, which is considered either as solely a crusade to end slavery (which it truly was not) or simply a defense of invaded territory (which it indeed was, but that does not tell the entire story by a long stretch). The truth of the Civil war, is that it was about economic factors and political beliefs, as all wars are.

The truth is, we do not like to see portrayals of ourselves as "the bad guys", even when that is indeed the fact of the matter. The business person of Maine, who connects themselves to the portrayal of corrupt and abusive leaders of 100 years ago, is going to be uncomfortable, because our values have been changed by the course of subsequent history, and most sane people recognize that treating workers badly is not productive for business.

Just as the portrayal of the happy servant joyfully serving his master is recognized generally as being that master's fantasy, so we have rejected the buffoonish "Mammy" in exchange for a successful businesswoman (as Aunt Jemima has surely become, in 150 years).

As uncomfortable as we may be with historical images, or portrayals, are we doing our children any favors by sanitizing them? Those people who have not been exposed to the portrayal of Aunt Jemima as she was in the Chicago World's fair, especially those who have only seen her portrayed as the sanitized successful businesswoman, are probably mystified by the harsh reaction to her image. However, even  her original image, portrayed by an actual former slave woman speaking in a strong dialect, has much to offer, in actually being a rare early instance of a successful black female spokesperson, the only one allowed into the Chicago world's fair. (History is multi-faceted, we lose much by reducing it to images, names, dates, and places.)

Those labor workers of a hundred years ago were not holding peaceful protests for shorter hours, they were literally fighting for their very lives. We live a better life today, because of the working person's rights that were hard earned by the very life's blood of those working to organize unions. To diminish those struggles by removing a mural that does not even show violent protest, but workers peaceably assembled, re-writes history, whether intentionally or not.

We as a nation have overcome racism to a great degree, overall. But ask any Native American how well we portray history. Or how open and accepting the "American Melting Pot" is, for that matter. Oh, by the way,  that's if you can even find one to ask. (Especially if you live east of the Mississippi River.)

Even our latest census asked us to pick one specific ethnicity, as though that is even realistic in the America of today. Children of mixed ethnicity have to choose one of their parents' ethnicities (usually whichever one is not "white"),  or pick "Other", as if they are such mutts they are unaware of their heritage. (I firmly believe we would have a much more meaningful census of ethnicity if we could choose any and all which apply, instead.)

What kind of disservice is it to ignore or demonize our history to the point we are ashamed to even see historical images out of context? Knowing that there were once products sold as "Niggerhair Tobacco" and places like the "Coon Chicken Inn" makes Aunt Jemima look positively politically correct in comparison. Knowing the history of racism in this country can illustrate many facets of our culture which otherwise do not make sense.

However, reacting to historical images from a modern cultural viewpoint is to me the same as dismissing herbal medicines (such as willow bark) because we have modern ones (such as aspirin, which was derived from willow bark originally) that are supposedly better (many modern medicines, because they concentrate the active ingredient, are harsher than their herbal cousins).

I think one of the proper ways to handle this situation is how many of the former states of the Confederacy have handled the "racist flag" issue: by replacing one flag of the Confederacy that was later used as a symbol of racist hatred (the infamous battle flag), by more neutral flags also used by the Confederacy which held the same historical value, but were not also charged with racial hatred.  I also think that exposing people to the historic images and placing them in the correct context can be a useful educational tool, so that we can all understand where we have come from and just how far we have progressed.

I do admit that holding on to hateful symbols just because they are historical is not a good thing, but I am afraid that turning our back on unwanted history allows us to fall into the same paths repeatedly, without the wisdom gained from perspective. I honestly feel that doing so is worse, than making people squirm by being confronted with what was ugly, but is now past. There are generations who have never been exposed to the routines of Amos and Andy, because we are ashamed of their portrayal of what it once was to be black in America. Yet, many of those same routines have broken the ground for modern performers, who might not have even had the chance without them.

Whether we like it or not, the fact is that American history holds instances of genocide, racial profiling (for every single immigrant population  to enter the country, not to mention the native inhabitants as well), slavery, and discrimination for all. Even many whites, if they were of the wrong religion, or spoke the wrong language... whether or not that was English.

It is up to all Americans to be aware of our past, so we can make informed decisions on where we should go from here. We can't allow our leaders to re-write our history to suit themselves, or any particular special interest group. We all need to face up to our true history, warts and all. It's not that it tells us who we are, but that it tells us who we were. Once we see truly who we were,  to be able to contrast that with who we are, we can start to think about who it is we wish to become, and possibly even get a few hints about how to get there.

Thank you, dear reader, for sticking with me through this little rant. Go in peace, and love your neighbor. And please, let's remember our history.

Time flies!

Sorry to take so long between posts, but I've been in a mad rush to do spring cleaning. Turns out I misplaced my wallet last Friday, and have been searching for it since, only to finally find it today. This generated an exhaustive (and exhausting!) binge of cleaning, trying to find it. I went through all of the laundry, and wound up moving the furniture, and doing vastly more than I originally intended. I also used my downtime creatively, to produce a simulation of what a prospective keyboard mod might look like: (see above). I love old typewriters, and the way some of them labeled their keys, so I tried to  simulate that. Alas, I only have Microsoft Paint as an editor at the moment, so this was a rather rough sketch. I like the way the keys look, though. I hate the indicator lights, but they looked even worse as anything else.
I am going to work on a few essays to post sometime this week, so there will be more goodies soon. I hope everyone enjoyed the "supermoon" last night, it was truly lovely here. See y'all soon, y'all come back now, y'hear?

Éireann go Bráth!

Yes, Ireland Forever! A very merry St. Patrick's day to everyone, and may the road rise up to greet you. (Preferably, not because you've had one too many pints!)

I love the celebration of the day in America. For one day, we all seem to have at least a bit of Irish in us (probably true, genealogically, anyway... Those Irish immigrants were prolific!) and there's a sea of green, in everything from shamrocks on the store windows for charity to the green beer flowing in many pubs. Just a marvelous excuse for a party. Everyone seems to be in a good mood, and we could certainly use a wee bit o' that.

Enjoy the wearin' o' the  green, don't drink so much you'll feel it tomorrow, and have yourselves a blast today.
I love you all!

The Ides of March

Considering the political implications of the day, I thought I would share this with everyone. A dear friend shared the link with me on facebook, and it is worth a read. "Power Concedes Nothing Without a Demand"

Thought for today, Pi day.

Admire beauty where you find it. Inform those who may possess it when you have the chance, few enough of us see our good points rather than our faults.

So, are you a French monk?

Okay, it's just us here right now, so let me tell you the story of my online persona.

Many long years ago, I was in Latin class in high school. We had several fun events, and dressed in togas, and other silly nonsense. One of my class partners was involved with the local branch of the Society for Creative Anachronism, or "SCA" for short. The SCA is a group of people who have events dressed in clothes of the middle ages, and have medieval crafts, and feasts, and so on. My class partner suggested it would be fun for me to come up with a persona, and come to my first function and introduce myself, so I thought about it, and decided I was to be the third son of a noble, who had been sent to become a church cleric, as a way to get an education and further myself. I was interested in both French and Latin as languages, and in the history of the thirteenth century, especially the rise of the monastic orders.
I made myself a costume, a Franciscan monk's robe, and wrote a letter of introduction to the local leader, in French.
Well, the meeting was a success, and I kept the persona, thinking of myself as a French monk, as time went on. I later joined a Norman/French household, and the lady of that household was introducing me to some other members: "...and here's Davide, he's our French Friar!", to immediate guffaws of laughter. (No, I do not make beignets... I do love them, though.)

Needless to say, the punny name stuck. I embraced it, as it was memorable, unique, and descriptive. Once the internet sprang into being, and I needed a serviceable 'handle', I chose to use it, and so most of my online friends know me by this appellation.

So, then, why the Abbey? An abbey to me speaks of sheltered space, a safe place away from the worldly hurts that surround us, a sanctuary in more than one sense of the term. They have also traditionally been havens for learning and education, and were centers for many entertainments of the day.

That's what I want my blog-space to be, a safe place to discuss politics, or religion, or sexuality, or any other hot-button topics without descending into the madness, or casting vitriolic statements at each other. I also want to try to inform and educate myself and others, and share cool bits of entertainment and knowledge as I encounter them spread throughout cyberspace.

I greet you with a warm hug, and welcome you again to Frenchfriar's Abbey.

Meta

Okay, so let me attempt my first link: this was fascinating, but terribly confusing.

meta from Jurriën Boogert on Vimeo.

Welcome!

Hello, and welcome to my new blog. I hope to share my interests, rants, raves, and plenty of opinions here. Please feel free to contact me, if you have any questions about anything I've posted. Politeness is expected here, you may certainly disagree with anything i may say, or comments others leave, but any uncivil comments will be summarily deleted. Respectful debate and civil, constructive criticism are both welcome and encouraged.

Please be patient with me as I learn, I hope to provide a truly interesting corner of the web quite soon.

~Frenchfriar